Still sleepin' funny.

Those sleep troubles I mentioned back in September? Still around. I don't know if Posterous timestamps each post, but for future reference, I began writing this at quarter past one in the morning.

The problem now is that I want to sleep. I really, really want to sleep. But every time I lay down and close my eyes, my brain turns on. In the past month, I'd estimate that I've fallen asleep on my first try three or four times. And there's been one, maybe two days where I didn't have a nap. I wish I could just skip a nap and make my body reset itself, but I don't work that way. I've tried. It only seemed to make matters worse, because at around the time I'd be napping, I'd feel like I was about to fall asleep whether I made it to the bed or not.

Almost every night, I try to fall asleep for half an hour. This begins anywhere between 10:30pm and 11pm. Once I inevitably realize that sleep isn't going to happen, I meander over to my laptop and tool around until one or two in the morning. I even keep the screen brightness on its absolute minimum so I don't confuse my body by giving it brightness when it's supposed to be sleepy time. I keep the light off in the room where my computer is, too. I play word puzzles, shitty Facebook games, and plod aimlessly around Subeta until I get frustrated enough to make sleep attempt number two. I've been lucky enough, I suppose, since my second attempt always results in sleep. I think it's because I'm so grouchy at myself for not having a normal-person sleep schedule that I force myself to lay there until sleep eventually happens. 

It's just about time to go back to bed and try for sleep again. I just wish I didn't have to get out of bed in the first place. The moment my head hits the pillow, my brain tries to tell me about all the fun and exciting things I could be doing. Fun fact: by "fun and exciting", my brain means "yaaaay shitty Facebook games."

Yet another trait I can add to the list of reasons I wish I was normal.

At least I have a vacation to look forward to. It isn't until December, but it will be so relaxing.

Oh, and my four-year anniversary with Andrew is in less than a month. Also something to look forward to. I'm sure it seems like I gripe about him quite a lot, but the real issue I tend to harp on is his video games... and frankly, if that's the biggest issue in our relationship, we're doing damn well. We've already managed to make it past -- and even accept -- that he and his family are Christian, and I'm not likely to become Christian, barring of course some kind of intense revelation in which God says, "Right. Here I am. Do with this information as you will."